Shedding Light

Change can be incredibly overwhelming and scary sometimes. Our initial reaction might be to resist such change, and that’s natural. I think that with time and perspective though, change turns into something that we can embrace rather than fear.

I am currently in that in-between stage where both resistance and acceptance exist. Change is coming, and I am ready to embrace it, but I am also overwhelmed by what is to come. I am sure many can relate to this feeling, whether it has to do family life, school, employment, or anything else.

I have lived in Cibola County my entire life. It has been one of my greatest joys to grow up here. Anyone can find negative things about any place, and I’ve heard my fair share of complaints about my home of 20-plus years. I think it is good to be aware of things that could be improved, because how would those things change if no one pointed them out? However, there’s a difference between acknowledging that things aren’t perfect, and just being negative, disparaging, and unhelpful.

I have loved living in Cibola County, and I have loved watching it grow and change over the years. The best friends a person could ask for to grow up with; the incredible teachers who I still chat with; the beautiful mountains and landscapes right at my fingertips; the warmth of living in a small community – all of these things have shaped who I am and I couldn’t be more grateful for them.

It wasn’t until I started working at the Cibola Citizen that I saw my community in a new light. I began to see it for what it was – a flawed community, like any other, with incredible resiliency, strength, and potential. I saw the lows and the highs, the weaknesses and the strengths, the needs and the growth. I’ve written about amazing individuals around the community and their selfless initiatives, and I’ve also written about the areas needing improvement.

With every downfall, came community members ready to tackle them. While there was animal abuse, there were also community members willing to donate their time and energy to nursing pets back to health and showing them the love they never had. There were businesses and initiatives ready to support these animals and fund their recovery. While there were reports of food poverty, there were also organizations from around the community – the VFW, community pantry, NMSU Grants, Grants Public Library, etc. – who took the initiative to start programs – like the Sharing Closet and Aggie Pantry – to address this problem and meet this need. While there were struggles with mental health, there were also businesses stepping up to be a resource for those struggling, and there were brave individuals who were vulnerable enough to share their struggles in the hope of it helping others. While there were jobs lost, there were also organizations, like CCEDF and the Chamber of Commerce, who worked incredibly hard to find new sources of employment and revenue for the community, as well as support existing and upcoming small businesses. And while there were government downfalls, there was also an evident increase in transparency, communication, honesty, financial prosperity, and growth all across the board.

The point is, with every negative, there was a positive not far behind, and that, to me, is the epitome of what it means to grow as a community. It was a crazy but awesome journey of growth to witness and to report on. I fully believe that this community is right in the middle of a transformation for the better and I am so excited to see it, even if I won’t be able to see it through up close anymore.

Just as Cibola County is embracing change, so am I. My journey with the Cibola Citizen has sadly come to an end, as I will be heading elsewhere for college in the fall. This job has been the blessing of a lifetime, but my education has always come first, and the time has come for me to pursue it away from home. While this makes me both overwhelmed and sad, it’s a life change that everyone faces at one time or another. I thank God every day for allowing me to be home for as long as could be, spend time with my family, write for the paper, be a part of this community, and receive a degree from NMSU Grants. Now, I’m surrendering this next chapter to Him, knowing that He has each step in the palm of His hand.

A verse that I am holding tight to as I enter this next chapter is Proverbs 16:9, which says, “We can make our plans, but the Lord determines our steps.” I grew up planning to go to college and be a writer in some capacity. The steps definitely didn’t always look like I thought they would, but they were exactly what they needed to be because they were determined by Him. So I take this next step, trusting that I will be okay no matter what, because the King of my heart goes before me.

While this may technically be the end, the Cibola community will likely still see articles from me from time to time, schedule-willing! Cibola County will always be home and I will always care about what goes on here. I may be leaving physically, but my heart will always have a special place reserved for Cibola.

Thank you, Cibola County, for welcoming me and my words. If my words impacted only one person, I would be content because that would be more than enough. Thank you for reading, thank you for sharing, and thank you for being one of my reasons to love writing. My prayers and best wishes are with you all.

God bless, Cibola!