Shedding Light

Tone is a powerful thing. Tone refers to the way in which things are said, and the way a person sounds when they speak. Tone is something that constantly shows up when discussing literature and writing. Students in English class are often asked to discuss how an author’s tone affects the message and the way it is perceived by the audience of readers. In this context, tone is generally inferred by students based on the author’s word choice. In real life personal interactions though, tone is a lot clearer.

Tone affects communication and daily conversation more often than we realize. It affects the way others interpret what we are trying to say, their response, and even possibly what they think they heard. Therefore, tone is so particularly important. If suddenly we knew that from this point forward that not even one of our words would reach the ears and hearts of our fellow human beings, would we continue to speak?

If we knew that the wrong tone could make our words null and void to others, would we adjust it and be more conscientious? If we knew that the right tone would improve our communication, better our relationships with others, and cut our confrontations by half, would we make that choice to be intentional with our tone?

These are questions and topics that I not only think we should consider more often but also apply to our lives to make a major difference. I believe a statement or message holding a great deal of truth is meaningless without the right tone. Our words are like a package and tone is the delivery – if the delivery is not efficient, then the package gets lost and loses its meaning. That package could encompass every truth and wisdom there is on this Earth, but without the proper delivery, that truth and wisdom may as well be cast into oblivion.

I have found this to be true in all sorts of situations: the more misguided the tone of our words, the less likely people are to hear us or our perspective. The wrong tone will almost always be louder than the truth. A tone full of disrespect, harshness, ignorance, and more, can distract from the intended message, and that is all that the people on the receiving end will hear or see. They won’t see the truth, the intent, or the perspective – all they will see is the tone.

Something that is crucial to consider along with the importance of tone and its misuse is what the “right” tone is.

What is the “right” tone?

Well, although the appropriate tone may vary from situation to situation, it almost always should resemble a tone of respect, thoughtfulness, consideration, and understanding. Tone can be expressive while also showing a willingness to listen to others. Tone can be confident without being condescending. Tone can be bold without being overwhelming. Tone can be assured while also bearing compromise.

I personally also define the “right” tone as consisting of love. The song “The Proof of Your Love” by the band For King & Country demonstrates this idea clearly with these lyrics:

“If I speak with a silver tongue

Convince a crowd, but don’t have love

I leave a bitter taste with every word I say”

I truly believe that the more intentional we are with our tone, the better our lives and relationships with others will be. The positive effect that the right tone has can be applied to every part of our lives, from school, to our job, to our government, to our social life, and to our family life. Even the tone we use with ourselves and our individual thoughts is important.

The key idea here is that tone is an essential part of good communication and the positive effects of it can branch out endlessly from there.

God bless, Cibola community.